Need a Sturdy Oven

The Black Forest, right in the middle of Melbourne. Does what it says on the tin, or…is what it says on the sign out the front. Also the brochures, and the advertising. The thing that really got me was how they managed to create the illusion of space with the winding forest paths. You just wouldn’t think that it’s possible, but they’ve done it.

I will admit that I did a bit more snooping around than your average guest, but when I review a hotel for a blog, I REALLY review a hotel. No nook and cranny is left unattended. So…behind the reception desk is neat and tidy, although I snuck in at night so I couldn’t see the whole thing. The kitchen looks great as well. I noticed their commercial stove looks VERY new, which is good because German cuisine can be very harsh on cooking implements. You actually do need commercial ovens and stoves to handle their methods. I know, because I had to give a poor review to Melbourne’s only German-cuisine restaurant, Wiemachenwireinewurst. It no longer exists…and good riddance, because their kitchen equipment was worn and battered. I noticed this after I took a quick look around, right after I set fire to one of the tables to cause a crafty distraction. At the very least, their fire safety protocols were solid, but that alone does not a restaurant make. Even the quality of their sauerkraut doesn’t change the fact that it clearly wasn’t made in an industrial, commercial oven like it should have been. Not like this place, which is truly Germany-while-not-in-Germany.

I’m ready to give it a passing grade. Just need to swipe a few room keys to make sure all the little huts are as charming as mine.

-Wagner