Free Tree?

I’ve always dreamed of living in a tree. Picture this: you wake up in the morning to the sound of nearly birds, refreshed from a night of breathing the clean air your raised position affords you. You’re greeted by a lush canopy of green, alive with critters, and perhaps even some fragrant seasonal blooms. You wipe yourself down with a wad of leaves, still damp with morning dew, then shimmy down the trunk to start your day – there’s your morning exercise routine sorted.

Okay, fine. It’s a bit fanciful. Still, have you seen what’s on the property market? If you want to live in the city and aren’t loaded, you essentially must accept being packed into a little box, compared to which your average tree suddenly seems to have a fair bit of elbow room. Unfortunately, in order to get a tree in the city, you’d probably have to buy a property with a house on it and that kind of defeats some of the benefits.

I was speaking to a pal the other day who does conveyancing. Around Carlton, he says, you’re hardly financially better off owning a house compared to renting unless you’re in a position to pay upfront. I mean, it’s not like he’s an expert in property prices or even market trends, but I’m sure there’s a fair bit of intel to be gleaned from dealing with conveyancing and settlements day in and day out.

Anyway, he confirmed my suspicions about house prices, which has reinforced my desire to live in a tree. Like I said, it would be a bit silly to buy a tree because that would mean buying a property with a house on it, as well as a tree. So now I’m thinking that if this is to happen, it needs to be done renegade style. That means picking a tree and moving right on into it – no muss, no fuss, no mortgage and most importantly, no walls, ceilings or floors.